Idiots in cars…
I was driving home last nite up 183 and noticed the guy next to me in an Acura reading some sort of business presentation. His eyes were firmly on his paperwork in bumper-to-bumper stop-and-go traffic. Nice.
I just love these types. Trying to drive, talk on the phone, put on makeup, and drink their Double Tall Half-Caff Lattes from Starbucks. Do you really think your full attention is on the road when you’re doing this? Geez.
I decided it was time to screw with Mr. Businessman. I managed to get ahead of him. Not a tough proposition when he’s reading and doesn’t notice the car ahead of him has moved. He would roll slowly behind the person in front and notice they’d stopped at the last second. I’d let a good size gap open in front of me and I’d slowly creep forward and let him get used to creeping at like 3-5 MPH right on my bumper and then out of the blue I’d slam on the brakes. He narrowly avoided hitting me a couple of times. I guess having a big ol’ Land Rover stop dead when you don’t expect it wakes you up. I do know that I’d drive away from any ‘contact’ with nary a scratch while my radiator-height trailer hitch would go right though his grill. After a few rounds of this I think he finally gave up on his paperwork out of frustration.
: Mambo 8 from the album “Office Space” by Perez Prado